There are times when I decide to choose what I think God would want me to do and painfully I find I am on a side road looking over at God as he hurtles down the Freeway. I am also convinced when I see God in these cases He is smiling at me ..and riding a Harley.

The past few weeks have been a good example of this. within a few days of the Green Hill Ambush I had determined ( without consulting God ) to get over the issue , move on, and Let God take care of business. I sincerely believe God has a different Idea.

On the day of the " correction in my belief " I was told that one " proof " of the fallacy of Calvinism was the decline of new Calvinists. As if God is looking for Quantity ....And as if you can measure the effectiveness of Evangelism by the number of Baptisms and Conversions.

Anyway the next day..I read in the paper that the Southern Baptist President is concerned that unless the SBC changes its ways it will be half the size it is in a decade.

I carefully looked through the Internet to find a Church I might be interested in attending and the one I zeroed in on I sent an Email for more information and still have not had a reply, but the church we decided to go to just " for the fun of it " now looks like a great haven for us .

I again choose to put the " ambush " behind me ..only to pick up the paper and read that the SBC ( our former denomination ) is choosing which Baptisms to honor and which to not honor...clearly unscriptual.

Phone calls, Letters, emails , newspaper articles ....I Just don't think God wants me to be finished with this business at GHBC ..and I don't think its my Ego getting in the way either ...I really want to walk away ...but I am not sure its possible.

The more I find out , the more that trickles out of the wall of silence and self deception from this Church, makes me realize that this kind of behaviour thrives like mold in the dark and secret places of the foundation.

I am not sure where all this is Going but I need to pay careful attention to what God's will is in this matter , and to amp up my prayer life with Him .

This morning I woke up deciding to write about " what should a church be " and instead this is what seemed to come crashing out ... Kenn